Page 15 - Sword-Bishop - His Personal Development

Sword-Bishop – His Personal Development

Again and again, I feel these terrible doubts when I have to recognise
what a weak, nay, unspeakably imperfect being I am. The least of
them all! But how should GOD make such a person His Instrument?
As I was thinking things over in this greatest distress, I suddenly felt
JESUS’ nearness. And immediately I saw in my mind’s eye a vast flock
of lambs. A dreadful bleating filled the air, of fright, pain and horror,
permeated with the awful smell of blood! It tore my heart when I
realised that almost each lambkin bore a hideous wound caused by
bites from the wolves. Suddenly JESUS stood before me and looked at
me with an inexpressible glance, which I will never forget! Full of pain,
love and pleading ...! He could have achieved anything with that look,
and so He always does. He handed me His shepherd’s staff and said
to me:
„Tend My lambs!“

At that moment, I was overcome by a tremendous love for these little
sheep. I felt as if I knew each and every one of them intimately. I
quickly tested the shepherd’s staff for structure and strength and
found to my satisfaction that it was unbreakable, although it was not
clear to me what it was made of. I immediately began to walk around
the herd in order to keep the wolves back and scatter them away. But I
was horrified to find that the wolves had indeed already forced their
way into the midst of the flock. I tried to disperse the intruders, but it
was impossible for me. There were too many of them. A boundless
paralysis and a painful helplessness befell me. I loved each of these
lambs so much and could not help them! In this great distress and
hopelessness I called upon the SAVIOUR, the Shepherd of all
shepherds, for help, and at once He was there, still with this un-
speakable look in His eyes. And He said:

„There is only one thing you can do: look for free meadows and lead
your entrusted lambs into them, one by one. In this way you can
separate the wolves, which are amongst them in their sheep’s
clothing. I have given you the heart to know and see through each of
your lambs so that no wolf can sneak in.“

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